As suggested by Yemi Adesanya
As the year winds up, here are the very many ways to laugh at the biggest news of the year’s end – the Nigerian guy who tried to blow himself on the plane – from the comments of people on the various news media. I mean, blow himself up on the plane, of course. He’s now called by the American media The Undie Bomber.
- Great balls of fire! – A headline yesterday in the New York Post.
- Came to Antioch library to check out the Koran. Then I realized that any Nigerian checkin out a Koran from a public library might be put on a list. So I checked out a James Patterson book instead. Echecrates-Enziga Emole‘s humour, culled from Facebook.
- This decade began with Y2K and ended with WTF. From BorowitzReport’s Twitter
- What better way to round out this scorched and shitty decade than to gaze thoughtfully into the charred, soiled underpants of a stranger. Culled from Xenijardin’s Twitter.
- Fruit of the Boom. – From a comment on Huffington Post.
- Northwest Airlines must be like, “Shit – for once we don’t overshoot the runway, and this happens.” – From BorowitzReport’s Twitter
- Manchester United handled business today. Something tells me that Umar Farouk was an Arsenal fan. Going trophyless four to five seasons can lead a man into suicide bombing. No kidding. Echecrates-Enziga Emole‘s humour, culled from Facebook
- Is that an explosive in your briefs or are you just glad to see me? – An online comment in response to the released pictures of the bomber’s briefs.
- Tiger should tell these terrorists that having 72 girls is more trouble than it’s worth. – From BorowitzReport’s Twitter
- Internet Scam emails from next year will now begin to read: “Dear Sir, My name is Omar Abdulmutallab, the twin brother of Umar who was captured in the US last year. He left in my account $400,000,000… etc.” – ktravula’s humour, culled from Facebook.
- One thing that’s been lost in this whole incident is that the terrorist broke the no-smoking rule. – From BorowitzReport’s Twitter
- CNN: Thank You Mr Ogundamisi. So can you confirm that the suspected terrorist is from Nigeria? Ogundamisi: No he is not from Nigeria he is from Katsina. Nigerian people don’t live in £4 million family homes in a choice part of London. CNN: But (Nigerian) President Yar’Adua is form Katsina? Ogundamisi: Nope! Yar’Adua …is… …from Jeddah close to Saudi Arabia. Nigerians go to General Hospitals. Leave me jare, I need Fuel! – Culled from the internet. I don’t know if this is from a real television interview, but it reads like something that could have taken place on the streets of Lagos, Warri or Port Harcourt.
- The first time Al-Qaeda decides to embrace affirmative action and give a black man a chance at matyrdom, the guy goes and blows up his penis. This is the last time they trust a black guy to do the job right. Echecrates-Enziga Emole‘s humour, culled from Facebook
Laugh with me people, and add your own jokes below – original or culled. If you are reading this in America, do not send me emails telling me that the word humour has only one “u”. I’m from Nigeria, damn it. Playing with firecrackers is not our only peculiarity!
1
Yemi Adesanya at http://YourWebsite
Comments on Huffingtonpost
… He strapped a bomb to his PACKAGE?!?!?! WHAT? I mean even for a suicide bomber that’s odd. Whats the point of the 40 virgins when you’ve done gone and blown off your package?
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Gives a whole new meaning to hot pants! 😉
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The screeners did not intercept
A bomber who turned out inept;
But a guy who’s on watch
With a charge in his crotch
Knew visas they’d gladly accept.
By JFD8
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blownoff junk + 72 virgins = eternal frustration
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On the ruler set on the undie-bomb image to show scale:
…no need for the ruler; we all know what underwear looks like
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Posted at December 30, 2009 on 6:43am.
2
Kola Tubosun at http://www.ktravula.com
Those Huffington Post commenters are something else, I tell you.
Posted at January 2, 2010 on 9:23pm.
3
Adeleke at http://YourWebsite
*This brings a new meaning to going out with a bang!
*He’ll never know if he was going or coming…
*Now we’ll have to remove our underwear when we go through customs!
*Sad the undie-bomber was not wearing boxers. Boxer Bomber has a better ring to it.
*The Undie-Bomber, he had a Weapon Of Ass Destruction.
*Jeanne Meserve just said “when he tried to light – uh – his bomb – on fire”
*The Christmas Day terrorist is now called the “undie-bomber.” Which, of course, means Tiger Woods will have to find a new nickname.
*On Christmas Day, his “Chestnuts roasting on an open fire”
Posted at December 30, 2009 on 7:28am.
4
Kola Tubosun at http://www.ktravula.com
Weapon of Ass Destruction? haha
Posted at January 2, 2010 on 9:22pm.
5
Abimbola Adunni at http://YourWebsite
If I were the guy’s girlfriend, I will sack him immediately. That area would have become cooked and utterly useless…Too bad he survived to see the remains of his ‘weapon of mass destruction’
Posted at December 30, 2009 on 9:09am.
6
Kola Tubosun at http://www.ktravula.com
Something funny happened yesterday. I was chatting with Benson, and I was about to send him a link to this page when he sent me a mail himself. It was a forwarded email from Sola containing all of the jokes on this post. I found out that it was obtained from a Yahoo groups called Nigerians in Diaspora. Interesting that I never thought that these jokes were so funny that they had reached so many corners of the world in a few days of publishing them, thanks to Adunni Abimbola.
Like Benson said a few minutes later “Humour it is that will survive us.” Everything else will soon be forgotten. I agree.
Posted at January 2, 2010 on 9:21pm.
7
Adunni at http://YourWebsite
There is fire on the ‘balltain’ and nobody seems to be on the run…
Posted at December 30, 2009 on 10:19am.
8
rayo at http://all4words.blogspot.com
OMG, dis was a rili gud laff. tnx K!
Posted at December 31, 2009 on 6:47am.